Insomnia

I Can’t Sleep Since They Took You

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I grew up watching Hollywood movies where someone always had to let go of someone else for their own good. You know the kind - the kind where someone makes a huge personal sacrifice out of love, even though it hurts. God, I loathed those self-righteous characters. I thought I understood it. Thought I could handle it better.

But life isn’t some dramatic script with a plot twist and a resolution waiting at the end. The air has been different, heavy with the absence of you. And every breath I take feels like poison seeping into my lungs. And every laugh — every fleeting moment of joy feels like a betrayal to this sadness inside me.

I remember our last fight, how we yelled over nothing, thinking we’d have time to make up. To think that I gave you away so easy. That all I did was watch and cry from a distance as they took you.

Now, everything’s all wrong and I’m poisoned by regret. My days are gray and empty and the nights are worse. I lie awake, and replay it all in my head. The words I said that I didn’t mean, and the ones I thought I should've said but didnt say. I see your face, that look of disappointment that hurts more than anything. It’s there every night, staring back at me in the dark.

I thought I could handle it, thought I’d be stronger than those movie characters I despised. But I was wrong. Insomnia grips me now, and every sleepless night is poisoned with you.

Thank you for taking the time to listen to my heart. I’d love to hear yours too. Please clap and share — it helps this story reach others who might relate to it. All my love!