Why I Don’t Believe in Best Friends

What losing one of my favourite people taught me about relationships

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This year I didn’t send a Christmas card to my best friend. This might not mean much to most people (considering how everyone is available online) but to me sending a card during the holidays is a way of saying ‘I’m thinking of you’ at a time of year when we gather with those we love the most. It takes time to pick, write, and send a card, something that I believe still has value in the digital age.

However, I have decided I no longer wish to extend that small gesture to someone who used to mean the world to me. This decision feels final, but it has been brewing for a long time. The distance between us has become less of a gap and more an ocean of unfamiliarity, as I struggle to figure out how to continue our friendship after all that’s passed between us.

As I move into a new year this decision has me thinking — if my best friend is no longer in my life, despite all my attempts to make it otherwise, what does that say about me and what does it mean for my future friendships?

I’d like to share the story of how I came to lose my best friend and the valuable lessons it taught me about myself and how I view relationships. In particular, it has taught me why I will likely never call someone a ‘best…