You Can’t Change Hearts and Minds

Arguing with someone leads nowhere. Is there a better way?

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I thought the other day, after talking with a neighbor, that sharing differing views in an attempt to persuade someone to change their mind was a useless endeavor. If it were a sales pitch, then yes, it’s possible to get someone to change their mind and buy from you, but often it comes with buyer’s remorse over the next few days, and if the buyer acts promptly, a cancellation of the order.

Some failed examples

What also prompted my thinking were several videos I watched during the last election cycle. In them, a young progressive sat in the middle of a circle of 20 die-hard right-wingers, many far to the right. The young man would then call someone up and they would ‛debate’ issues for a few minutes before someone else had a turn.

It was all very enticing to watch, thinking ‛Who will he win over?’ with his arguments based on facts, versus their arguments based on emotions. If he was successful at all, it was with those whose beliefs were not that strong. For everyone else, it was a waste of time.

I watched other videos that contained interviews with MAGA people who, when confronted with the illogic in their thinking, still wouldn’t change their minds. They clung ferociously…