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I’m a Passenger, Not the Driver of My Life
The struggles of having severe ADHD
Oftentimes, I feel like my mind is just floating outwards, not really tethered to anything. My thoughts are pulled away in different directions without me having a say in them.
It’s like I have no control over them. It’s quite a disempowering feeling.
I’m always preoccupied with how others may be thinking of me and judging me. I’m always concerned about pleasing others because I’m unable to give myself self-love and self-worth.
All this can be traced back to my ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). My mind is so easily distracted, and my focus is almost non-existent. This prevents me from functioning effectively and being true to myself.
Whatever choices or actions I make aren’t based on my core interests but instead on what I think others might want.
It’s quite a tough thing to overcome. It’s like that part of my brain has to be physically rewired so I can shift my attention from others onto myself.
I’ve been undergoing hypnotherapy for the past few years…and changes have been incredibly slow. But I’m ok with it as I know how deep and serious my condition is.
Recently, I’ve started taking Xanax, which has made a fair bit of improvement. I’m doing deep breathing as well daily, or at least I’m trying to as best I can.
Hopefully, with all these, I’ll eventually break free from these mental problems and regain control over my mind.
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