I Am Learning to Choose the Next Kind Thing for Myself

And feel less guilty about it

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I’m gonna be honest. I hate those articles that lay out clichéd phrases like “I have found my way in life by using these five tools to self-improvement,” or, “I have set healthy boundaries by saying yes to me and saying no to things that do not spark joy”. They seem patronising, self-indulgent and obnoxious, no matter how lovely the people and the aims have been.

Instead, let me start with a story.

Me and my partner recently travelled to Agadir, Morocco. We had gotten a very cheap deal and had three and a half days to spend there. Short and sweet, we thought, and counted down the days, tired from our jobs and stormy weather that has become the norm here in Scotland.

When we arrived, the sky was cloudy and we knew that the weather forecast promised rain. Lo and behold, when we got to the hotel, the heavens opened and intense rainfall moved over the dusty streets, long and snaking beach promenade and our hotel pool.

Locals were happy. We chatted with a few different people that day — in the hotel and souvenir shops — and, by various accounts, it had not rained in three, or six, or fifteen years. I guess people all remember things differently.