How I Turned Heartbreak and Hunger Into Motivation

What I learned when I had no one, nothing, and nowhere to turn

Photo by on

There was a time I felt very heavy in heart. To be honest, it has to be one of the many hard times I must have experienced. It wasn’t easy dealing with heartbreak and also catering to my basic needs.

The pain was neither loud nor noticeable, but a slow, quiet pain, eating through me. Now and then, I felt that something was missing inside of me, but I just couldn’t fix it.

Nights came when I couldn’t sleep, and mornings when I wished I didn’t wake up. Most times, the thoughts of suicide were the only thing that came to my mind. Just to end the pain and not stress anyone, it was better to end it all in silence. I always felt less than the least, like I didn’t matter, like I could disappear and nothing would get to change, no one would notice. Everyone just moves on with their life.

Hope did not exist within me due to exhaustion. My body joined my mind in complete exhaustion. My situation left me without a clear direction for my future actions. Sometime in the past, I became aware of the fact that I needed to leave my current state. I was patiently waiting for both conditions and individuals to transform my situation.