Advice / Life Lesson
The Power of Saying NO
The sooner we realise this — the better!
As a reluctant, strong-headed kid — clarity of thought and appreciating the power of saying NO took its sweet time with me.
Along with my cousin, I would spend the summer holidays playing and learning cricket at the coaching academy run by the ex-Indian cricket team captain — Bishan Singh Bedi, conducted at Jamia Milia Islamia Sports Grounds in Delhi, India.
A driver would drive us to the cricket grounds every day at 5.30 AM during the summer holidays. The day would start with us running 10 full circle rounds of the cricket ground as a preliminary warm-up, followed by stretching and loosening exercises as the overall warm-up routine.
This would be followed with breakfast comprising a glass of milk and a couple of bananas only. Thereafter, a few hours of training in the nets, and then a brief 20-over game followed by lunch and finishing off the day late in the afternoon around 4 PM.
This process repeated — for six days a week for three months. Most kids love sports. Some love all sports. Some only a few. Very few start having strong feelings against a sport. I never knew I could hate a game of sport to the extent that I would purposely play badly during these coaching sessions that sometimes people would be left gaping at the lack of skill or the attempt thereof.
I would purposely drop catches, misfield, and bowl wide balls that would critically bisect the gap between the wicketkeeper and the third man fielder or just get bowled out at the easiest of balls whilst batting.
At the end of the first year of summer camp, a felicitation ceremony was held at Le Meridian: a 5-star hotel in Delhi. Bishan Singh Bedi and Kapil Dev, another Indian cricketing legend and also the ex-captain of the Indian cricket team, were calling up each kid on stage along with their parents and felicitating kids with certificates, mementoes and acknowledging their cricketing skills.
For instance, commending someone’s outswing bowling, another’s cover drive or someone’s reverse swing. And come my name — Kapil Dev shakes my dad’s hand and mine and the only comment that Mr Bedi could add about my ‘skillset’ was that I was ‘a bit on the naughtier side’.
My father was never a pushy parent but was as confused as anything and the first thing he asked me after coming off the stage was, “So, they had not even a single good thing to say about your game? Like how someone can be that bad at cricket?” Or rather that bad or have no skill at all.
For non-Indian readers, cricket in India is like football in Europe or baseball in the Americas. Everyone plays and follows the game of cricket to the extent that the first toy a family would get a kid, would be a cricket bat or a ball. My response to him — I don’t like cricket! At all. I want to play football!
It took me a full summer camp of three months to say it out loud to my father- No, I don’t like cricket and don’t want to play. I wouldn’t say I never played cricket thereafter in my life but didn’t pursue the game as a passionate player. I still play a leisurely game every once in a while, with my childhood friends and follow the game, in fact, some of the legends of the game have been an inspiration but football has since become a part of my life.
It’s this simple concept of saying no to things that one doesn’t like or is not keen on and focusing on doing what one enjoys doing, which is what I learnt the hard way although still very early on in my life and boy, it has helped in a big way!
I am not a professional football player but I did play decent football across the years at school, college, district and state levels and during my time in different parts of the world, and still passionately follow and pride in association with the sport for over two and a half decades now.
Life Lesson: Power of saying no. And simply focusing on things one enjoys and aspires to can compound to wonders in life.
Or as the investment world’s legend Charlie Munger says:
The ability to say ‘no’ is a tremendous advantage for an investor.
Or as I like to infer- A great investor is a great rejector!
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