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I Illegally Assisted in My Mom’s Suicide
The Medical Examiner’s surprising final comment to me
I recently realized that my age, 74, is 2 years older than the age of my mom at her death in 1993. That realization wasn’t a total surprise, but I hadn’t stopped to contemplate it and measure her life against mine.
As I grew up, I knew my mom’s health was a concern and had been for a long time. There were constant doctor visits trying to figure out what was causing the weakness on her left side that got progressively worse every year. Eventually, by her late 60s, her left arm became useless, her left hand was always clenched into a fist, and she couldn’t lift her left leg, which made walking a challenge.
Her doctors prescribed a variety of medications, and all failed. Surgery on her neck was no help, and she accepted the likelihood of never finding an answer.
Then she finally found a doctor who accurately diagnosed her issue. He’d only seen one other case; primary lateral sclerosis, similar to MS, but affecting only her left side. He advised there was no cure, but she wouldn’t die of it. To her it was a huge relief, finally knowing.
My mom, for decades, would casually mention that she fully intended to end her life on her own terms, not hospitalized and unable to function, not a burden…
