The “knowledge” conundrum (and a ramble)
So, I want to get a PhD… and I am 273 days in.
Here’s a conundrum I am facing — What do you do if how much ever you learn, you feel the chasm between you and being an “expert” in a field widening? I thought I had a good grasp over a particular subject (one that I’ve just begun my PhD in, by the way), but the last 7 months of my PhD have taught me that I barely know anything. The knowledge I possess currently is but a scratch in the surface of what can be achieved and understood in my field. And yet, I know more than I did a week ago, a month ago, a year ago, when I was just dipping my toes into how to process brain signals, understand how people with neurological disorders navigate the world, and how I may try and improve their lives just a tiny bit better.
Of course, this conundrum was exacerbated by a very short knowledge transfer period between my seniors in the lab and I. Three months trying to assimilate not only the technical knowledge of someone who has done a 5 year PhD (and has a masters degree in the same field, which I do not) but also their soft skills (how to talk to a stroke survivor? how to talk to your PI? how to talk to others in your lab?) seems too less of a time — not just to listen to how its done, but practice, fail, and relearn.
Pessimism rears its head — my undergrad education was a strictly structured 8–4, with coursework scheduled in continuous one-hour periods; even breaks were timed and structured. This external enforcement never let me think about what I need to do next — removing all the decision fatigue from work. This was not too different from my school, either. Being an International student changes much of the structure — now I have to live on my own and take care of myself, health-wise, but also have a decent research output and stay on top of my coursework. Not a very unique situation to be in, yet challenging in its varied experiences in the student community.
So, I think, the first step to narrowing the knowledge chasm, is to reduce the decision fatigue. Kind of far fetched, I know, but hear me out:
- You are making decisions from the moment you wake up (including whether you have to wake up now or just snooze that alarm), and you spend quite a lot of mental energy on those decisions.
- Choosing what to eat is one of my major causes of decision fatigue. Then comes cooking, meal-prepping and washing all those dishes. Include laundry and chores feel like a Sisyphean task.
- Then, commute to university on a bus (which rarely ever is on time) in 35 degree weather (celsius — but 35 fahrenheit also is a horrendous temperature, for someone from a tropical climate), and you are sapped of all energy by the time you log into your computer (this last issue is a result of a bunch of decisions, beginning with the time you start from home).
- After that, deciding which project to work on (usually it is more than 2), for how long, which aspect of the project to get done (protocol design, meetings, literature, analysis, admin work, data collection), and the list goes on.
- Come back home (or visit the Campus Rec for a quick workout if you have the energy for it) after another hour long commute and you are at 5% body battery by 9 pm.
Most days look this way — the similarity of having no routine. My goals are to establish and routinise “good habits” (which are aligned to my priorities in life, and it may look different for you), removing the decision fatigue (a friend suggested automatization, leveraging technology, if you’re savvy enough) but also reducing the friction between the tasks (such that one would flow easily from the previous one, and are interlinked).
Coming back to our main point — fix the secondary activities that are taking away from your main goals (in a broad sense, knowledge) and you will automatically have more energy to spend on what matters (I hope, let’s experiment!)
