AI generated image by DeepAI

🧨 “The Couch Whisperer Chronicles”

💥 How to Transform a Place in 30 Days by Tidying (Even When You’d Rather Lie Down and Decompose)

💬 Some people find tidying “therapeutic.” I found it repulsive. Then something weird happened in week three involving a spoon, a playlist, and a minor personal revolution

DAY 0: “THIS PLACE DESERVES TO ROT, AND SO DO I.”

Let me start by saying: I did not tidy my house out of ambition, joy, or anything remotely Instagrammable.

I did it because my floor lamp started flickering like a horror movie clue, and I couldn’t reach the plug without moving three pizza boxes, one dead plant, and an unopened package labeled “Emergency Socks.”

There comes a point where your surroundings start mocking you.
Where the pile of laundry becomes a geological feature.
Where mugs on your desk hold ecosystems.
Where you name the dust bunny “Harold.”

This was that point.

I hated myself a little bit, if I’m honest. I wanted to want to clean, but mostly I wanted to dissolve.