‘Guilty as Sin?’ — A Breakdown
Have you ever listened to the song ‘Guilty as Sin?’ by Taylor Swift?
Well, if you’re reading this, then you probably have.
Let me give you a background:
‘Guilty as Sin?’ is the 9th track of Taylor’s 11th studio album ‘The Tortured Poets Department’. It’s a song produced by Jack Antonoff. It’s a soft-rock/pop-rock song.
And supposedly, it’s about infatuation and desire.
Longing for someone.
The type of longing when you know that everyone would give you trouble for, so you keep it locked (in lowercase) inside a vault.
So if you’ll allow me, I’ll be explaining to you the lyrics which I think are extremely meaningful (breaking down the entire song).
You can listen to the song while we’re going over it. Here:
Drownin’ in the Blue Nile
He sent me “Downtown Lights”
I hadn’t heard it in a while
My boredom’s bone-deep
Starting off with these lyrics: The narrator says that the man she will continue to mention all throughout the song sent her a copy of the song ‘The Downtown Lights’ by the band ‘The Blue Nile’. Over reviewing the lyrics of this song, it goes over loneliness and exploring company in an urban setting.
She claims to be ultimately bored with her current living situation.
This cage was once just fine
Am I allowed to cry?
I dream of cracking locks
The ‘cage’ the narrator is referring to may connect with her life. The ‘cage’ that everyone considers to be normal.
Connected to that: there’s the ‘I dream of cracking locks’. Clearly, anyone with a decent pair of eyes would come to conclude that she means that she isn’t comfortable in her way of life. She dreams of getting out.
The best one of all (which was used in the back cover of one of her albums), ‘Am I allowed to cry?’ Personally, I think this is a very sentimental statement. In her caged environment, she feels as if everyone is watching her, studying her every move.
So she asks, ‘Am I allowed to cry?’
Throwing my life to the wolves
Or the ocean rocks
The narrator explains that she feels like she’s throwing away her life to the ‘wolves’, which is a metaphor for the paparazzi and social setting she is in. As one of the most influential women of all time, Taylor Swift gets crowded by many people. Her space gets invaded by everyone; and she feels unsafe with that environment.
The ‘ocean rocks’ on the other hand, is a reference to her Rhode Island house that you’d probably heard of in the song ‘the last great american dynasty’.
Crashin’ into him tonight, he’s a paradox
I’m seeing visions
Am I bad or mad or wise?
As the narrator further pushes into the storyline of the song, she mentions that she ran into the man she desires (‘Crashin’ into him tonight’). She adds that he is a ‘paradox’.
When you call someone a ‘paradox’, that means that they have two qualities or traits that are contradictory. Two assets that don’t go together.
As she goes on, she shows paranoia; overthinking. She starts seeing ‘visions’ and questions her dignity. These visions are related to the man she longs for, and she despises herself for that.
I keep these longings locked
In lowercase inside a vault
The narrator claims that her longings are hidden away, so buried, that she keeps them away locked in a vault.
This means that many people might not approve of the relationship, possibly herself included. It may be an unideal, forbidden love, so she keeps her flame for him secret.
Someone told me
There’s no such thing as bad thoughts
Only your actions talk
Personally, this is one of my favorite lyrics in the entire song. I believe that the statement is true; there is no such thing as ‘bad thoughts’.
The narrator of the song states that someone told her: if you have ‘bad thoughts’ and you don’t act on them, then they weren’t even bad in the first place.
She’s forcing herself to believe that as long as she doesn’t make a move with the man she yearns for, the idea isn’t so horrible.
These fatal fantasies
Giving way to labored breath
Taking all of me
We’ve already done it in my head
The narrator.. well.. uses a bit of imagination guiding her movements whilst in thought of the man; she’s in lust.
To be honest, that’s all I have to say.
If it’s make believe
Why does it feel like a vow
We’ll both uphold somehow?
The narrator claims that if all of it is pretend, then why does she feel the need to commit? Even more so, why do both of them feel the need to commit?
She claims that it ‘feels like a vow’ and ‘they’ll both uphold it somehow’. This being said, if they commit, they’ll both pay the price.
What if I roll the stone away?
They’re gonna crucify me anyway
What if the way you hold me is actually what’s holy?
The narrator makes reference to the life of Jesus Christ. If you aren’t Catholic or Christian, then let me give you a brief explanation of Jesus’ background.
Jesus Christ was made to suffer; he sacrificed his life for mankind. They made him carry the cross he was soon to be crucified on. They hid away his body in a tomb, and the stone was rolled away a few days later. He ressurrected when everyone thought he couldn’t, after all, he’s the son of God.
Anyway, Taylor uses this as an example (which isn’t really the best thing to do, considering the amount of hate she’d get).
She asks ‘what if she rolls the stone away?’, meaning, what if she unveils this seemingly forbidden romance to the world? She notes that even if the media hated her and her lover, she’d still be despised.
She asks if the way he holds her is actually what she’s been searching for her entire life.
If long-suffering propriety is what they want from me
They don’t know how you’ve haunted me so stunningly
I choose you and me religiously
Personally, I love this part of the song with my whole heart.
The narrator says in this part of the song that if people want to see her suffer and be in horrid pain, they didn’t need to press on her because she already felt that way.
And she felt that way because she felt ‘haunted’ by the man she longed for.
She felt as if he never even left her side.
And my favorite part of the entire song, she claims that she chooses her and her lover religiously. No matter what.
Now, let’s dive into the chorus. A.K.A., my favorite part of any Taylor Swift song ever.
What if he’s written “mine” on my upper thigh only in my mind?
The narrator questions if the man she craves has written ‘mine’ on her upper thigh as a sign of possesion. The mere fact that he wanted her.
But it was only in her mind.
One slip and fallin’ back into the hedge maze
Oh, what a way to die
As the narrator mentions this, she lets us envision two things:
- The ‘maze’ she mentions might be related to how the media and pop culture treated her. That being mentioned, her past relationship with Joe Alwyn was very often talked about. Rumors and many other things were in whispers.
- The ‘maze’ she mentions might be falling in love. Falling in love is a very dangerous game; it’s like falling into a trap sometimes. Which leads the narrator to think that she’s falling into a maze where she’d end up lost and alone.
And she says ‘what a way to die’, meaning it would eventually kill her.
I keep recalling things we never did
Messy top-lip kiss, how I long for our trysts
The narrator talks about reminiscing on events that never happened; but they popped up in her mind.
She mentions how she longs for their trysts (which is a romantic, hidden meeting). She also talks about how they’ve kissed in her wild imagination.
Without ever touchin’ his skin
How can I be guilty as sin?
As the chorus (and song) come to an end, she questions herself.
‘If I never committed a crime, why do I feel as I did?’
If she never even touched his body, how does she feel guilty? Why is she convicting herself for something she’s only ever thought of doing?
‘If I was never a criminal, why would I even think of becoming one?’
And that, my friends, is the beauty of the song ‘Guilty as Sin?’
Throughout the song, she shows desire and yearning for one person who would clearly be the end of her one day.
But the more she thinks of it, she realizes it wouldn’t be so bad.
