Living with the Weight of Anxiety
Practical Steps to Find Calm Amid the Chaos.
For years, anxiety has been an uninvited companion in my life, whispering fears and doubts when I least expect them. It shows up in the form of endless worry about unfinished tasks, the fear of judgment, and the pressure to be perfect in every moment. It’s the nagging voice that reminds me of mistakes I’ve made — like a missed opportunity or a misstep — and insists that the consequences will follow me forever. It makes my mind race with thoughts about losing everything: money, relationships, or even my sense of security.
Sometimes, it’s the smaller things that cause the biggest stir — the things I know I should be doing but don’t want to face, or the worry of letting others down. The weight of anxiety can feel overwhelming, often without a clear reason, but with every passing day, I’ve learned that it doesn’t define me. Instead, it’s something I can understand, face, and eventually manage.
This article isn’t about offering a perfect solution, but about acknowledging anxiety for what it is and sharing the ways I’ve learned to cope with it. If you, too, have ever felt that invisible weight, I hope this resonates with you.
Understanding Anxiety Triggers: The Things That Set It Off
Anxiety can creep up in many forms, sometimes for reasons that feel too trivial to explain, but often with a deep, underlying cause. For me, one of the most persistent triggers is the thought of unfinished tasks. Whether it’s a list of things I know I should do or lingering responsibilities that seem too big to face, the thought of not crossing them off the list weighs heavily on my mind. The pressure to stay productive, to never be behind, creates a constant sense of urgency, making me feel as if I’m always chasing something just out of reach.
Another trigger for me is the fear of judgment. I’ve often found myself worrying about how others perceive me — wondering if I’ve said the wrong thing, or if someone is disappointed in me. It’s a subtle, yet ever-present feeling that makes me second-guess my words and actions. Whether it’s in a professional setting, with family, or even among friends, the fear that people might think less of me can sometimes paralyze me into silence or over-explanation.
Perfectionism is another familiar foe. It’s not just about being good at what I do; it’s about wanting to be perfect. I worry that if I’m not flawless, I’ll fall short. Whether it’s in my work, relationships, or even my appearance, this quest for perfection often leaves me feeling exhausted and unfulfilled, because nothing ever feels “good enough.” And when things go wrong — when I make mistakes or miss a mark — it amplifies that anxiety, filling my mind with thoughts of failure and the consequences that may follow.
Money, and its fleeting nature, has always been a major source of stress. From the fear of making unwise decisions to the anxiety about unexpected costs, I find myself worrying about not having enough. I constantly replay my past financial mistakes, regretting what I should have done differently, even though I know these things can’t be changed. The thought of losing money or making another poor decision has the power to make my heart race, leaving me paralyzed with indecision or overwhelmed by worst-case scenarios.
In addition to these, there are everyday worries that set off my anxiety — like the thought of losing a partner, not living up to expectations, or dealing with tasks I just don’t want to face. Sometimes, it’s the simple fact that life can be unpredictable, and I fear the unknown. And then, of course, there are those times when everything — work, relationships, responsibilities — is piling up all at once. The pressure builds, and anxiety begins to feel like a tidal wave, just waiting to drag me under.
One of the most frustrating and exhausting triggers is waking up in the middle of the night, often around 3 am. Maybe even the smallest detail will pop into my mind — something I forgot to do or a conversation I wish I had handled differently. And just like that, my mind goes into overdrive. Sleep slips away, and I’m left lying there, staring at the ceiling, replaying scenarios and worst-case outcomes. The quiet of the night becomes a battleground for thoughts that keep me wide awake, knowing that sleep, at least for that night, is over.
What I’ve come to realize is that these triggers aren’t just things I think about — they’re feelings, often tied to past experiences or imagined fears. And while they may always be part of my life, learning to recognize them has been the first step in managing them.
Coping Mechanisms: Navigating Anxiety with Compassion and Action
When anxiety feels overwhelming, it can seem impossible to know where to begin. But there are ways to manage it, and though the journey is personal, a few practices have helped me regain control and calm. These methods don’t erase anxiety, but they do provide tools to make it more manageable.
1. Mindfulness and Meditation
One of the most effective ways I’ve learned to handle anxiety is through mindfulness. Taking a moment to breathe, focus on the present, and acknowledge my feelings without judgment has been incredibly helpful. Whether it’s a quick breathing exercise or a few minutes of meditation, this practice grounds me when my mind begins to race. I’ve found that the more I practice mindfulness, the easier it becomes to recognize the early signs of anxiety before they spiral out of control and I will often put my headphones in in the middle of the night to listen to a sleep story or meditation on Spotify.
2. Movement and Exercise
Physical activity is a natural stress reliever. Whether it’s a brisk walk, yoga, or a more intense workout, exercise helps release built-up tension. It is my number 1 go-to! I’ve noticed that even on days when I feel low on energy or overwhelmed, a short burst of movement can do wonders for lifting my mood and calming my mind.
3. Writing and Journaling
Sometimes, putting my thoughts on paper is the best way to release them. Journaling allows me to express my worries without holding back. It’s a way of unloading the mental clutter and gaining perspective. Writing down what I’m anxious about also helps me to see patterns in my thinking, which can be the first step in addressing the root cause of my anxiety. And often, when you re-read what you have written in the past it helps you understand that everything passes.
4. Anxiety Affirmations
Another coping mechanism I’ve found particularly powerful is using anxiety affirmations. These positive, grounding statements help shift my mindset when negative thoughts take over. Affirmations remind me that I am in control, that I can face my fears, and that I am worthy of peace. If you’re looking for a way to create more mental space and calm, I’ve created a set of anxiety affirmation cards and anxiety coping statements that you can use to empower your thoughts and ease your anxiety. You can find them in my shop .
5. Talking It Out
Sometimes the best way to deal with anxiety is simply to talk about it. Whether it’s with a friend, family member, or a therapist, sharing my worries can lighten the load. When I open up, I often realize that my fears are not as big or insurmountable as they seemed in my head. Having someone listen, without judgment, can provide a sense of relief and reassurance.
6. Setting Boundaries
Anxiety often stems from feeling overwhelmed or overcommitted. Learning to say no and setting healthy boundaries has been crucial for me. It’s not always easy, but protecting my time and energy has allowed me to focus on what truly matters, rather than spreading myself too thin.
7. Acceptance
Finally, accepting that anxiety is part of my life and that it won’t always be under control, has brought me peace. There are days when I may feel anxious for no reason at all, and I’ve learned to be gentle with myself during those times. Recognizing that it’s okay to feel anxious and that it doesn’t make me weak or inadequate, has been a huge step in my healing process.
Finding Peace in the Chaos
Anxiety is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to define it. By understanding what triggers it and equipping ourselves with tools to cope, we can begin to take back control. It’s not about eliminating anxiety — some days will be harder than others — but about building resilience towards it and learning to navigate those moments with compassion and care.
For me, it’s been a journey of self-discovery, trial and error, and a lot of patience. I’ve realized that it’s okay to not have everything figured out. What matters most is that we continue to try — to breathe through the chaos, to lean on the people and tools that ground us, and to remind ourselves that we are capable of facing even the most overwhelming days.
If you’re feeling anxious, know that you’re not alone. Your experiences are valid, your emotions are real, and you are stronger than you may think. Take it one step, one breath, and one moment at a time. Peace may not always come easily, but it’s always worth striving for.
Thank you for taking the time to read this article. I hope you found it helpful and empowering. Your thoughts and experiences are valuable to me, so please feel free to share them in the comments section below. I look forward to catching up with you soon. Louise ;)
