Why You’ll Never Be Fully Self-Aware (And That’s Actually a Good Thing)

Understanding yourself better is the key to everything else.

Photo by on

Self-awareness. It’s one of those things that sounds simple, but when you dig into it, you realize how complex (and essential) it is to everything you do. Being self-aware doesn’t just mean you understand your surroundings better — it’s about understanding yourself, your habits, and your internal traits. You become more observant, not just of what’s going on around you, but also of what’s happening inside of you.

One of the most immediate impacts of self-awareness is how it opens your eyes to behaviors and patterns that you might not even realize you’re picking up on. For example, you might notice certain behavior patterns from your family that just don’t sit right with you. Maybe you’ve been unconsciously mimicking things that no longer align with who you are or want to be. That’s self-awareness kicking in. It’s not about blaming anyone, but rather seeing those influences and deciding what fits with the person you’re becoming.

But here’s the thing: self-awareness isn’t some end goal you achieve and check off your list. It’s not like one day you’ll wake up and think, “Ah, finally, I’m fully self-aware. Done with that!” Nope. It’s a lifelong practice. There’s no age or time limit. Sure, there are moments when you might have major insights — those “aha” moments where you take a leap forward. And then, there are times when life gets overwhelming, and you might lose that mindfulness temporarily. And that’s okay. The point is, it’s a journey, not a destination.

The Cycles of Self-Awareness

One of the most powerful realizations in cultivating self-awareness is understanding that life isn’t linear. It’s cyclical. We like to think of things in terms of beginnings and endings, but life doesn’t work that way. There are phases — times when we’re learning, processing, acting, and then going back to question everything all over again. It’s all part of the process.

Here’s how I break it down into four stages:

• Inquisition:This is where it all starts, with a question. Maybe you’re asking yourself, “How can I be more self-aware?” That curiosity is the seed.
• Acquisition: This is the information-gathering phase. You start reading, listening to podcasts, having conversations, absorbing new ideas. It’s where you start collecting all the pieces of the puzzle.
• Processing:Now, you take all that information and process it. This can happen in different ways — journaling, meditating, talking it out with a friend, even drawing. It’s about finding meaning in what you’ve learned.
• Action: Finally, you get to apply what you’ve learned. You start experimenting, testing out what works for you and what doesn’t. But here’s the kicker — after you take action, you circle right back to the inquisition phase. You question what worked, what didn’t, and start the whole cycle again.

It’s not a finish line you’re trying to reach — it’s a continuous process. And that’s where the beauty of self-awareness lies. It’s not about achieving something; it’s about *being* in the process.

Balancing Mind, Body, and Spirit

To make self-awareness truly impactful, it’s important to consider the different perceptions we have as humans. We tend to focus on one or two aspects — like maybe we get really caught up in our minds or hyper-focus on our bodies — but each plays an important role in how we experience life. It’s about finding that balance between mind, body, and spirit.

Some people throw all their energy into their mental health, while others focus solely on physical well-being or spiritual growth. The key is to recognize that all three aspects are interconnected and contribute equally to your self-awareness. It’s about utilizing all the tools at your disposal for a wider, more complete perspective on yourself and the world.

Self-awareness is a journey, and like any journey, it’s important to stop every now and then, take in the view, and appreciate how far you’ve come. Yes, there will be moments of frustration or times when you feel like you’re going in circles — but those are all part of the process. The more you cultivate self-awareness, the more you’ll start to see that it impacts *every* area of your life. From your relationships to your career, to the way you experience joy, pain, and everything in between.

So, enjoy the ride. Don’t rush it. Self-awareness isn’t something to “achieve” — it’s something to live.