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I Had a Bite-Sized, Deep Conversation with My Spouse That Reset My Week
The length doesn’t matter as much as how you chat
Have you had such a busy week that your relationship was put on the shelf?
Last week felt like that for me. My usual routine with my husband was altered for 11 nights, as we were hosting his mom. Some parts of her apartment were being renovated and it wasn’t healthy to sleep there. He had to wake early to ferry his mom to and fro. We had dinners with her too.
So when we had couple-time on Saturday, during lunch, I realized I didn’t know how his week went. We hadn’t chatted as freely during dinners. The dynamics were different with the three of us, even as she’s a lovely lady.
I didn’t want to ask him the usual “how are you”s. They normally produce vague responses.
So I started with this.
“What’s been on your mind lately?”
To my surprise, this question cut right to the heart of what was bothering him. It turned out to be a work issue that he hadn’t mentioned before.
All my “how’s your day”s couldn’t yield this insight. “What’s been on your mind” seemed to help him distill and communicate the issue that was frustrating him. His reply was also…