Member-only story
Women and that Likable Factor
When encounters in hetero marriage compound society’s preference for men
First, let me say that the people I like and trust the most don’t care about being likable for the sake of being likable. I’m suspicious of people who don’t prefer their own company and try to form fast alliances like kids feel they must do to survive middle school.
Weary of the pack mentality, I don’t believe in safety in numbers nor think marriage to a man protects me any more than marrying a dear friend. Yet, marriage still leaves me with questions.
“But don’t you see that marriage, from its roots in tracking a woman’s fertility, benefits men?” I ask, sipping coffee. The recipient isn’t just a friend this time — it’s my husband. “Not at all. Now drink up before it gets cold,” he replies, raising an eyebrow in mock poisoned your drink suspicion, a joke we often play. And I laugh because he’s funny.
Many women today question whether they’re the “marrying kind” before, during, or even after a marriage. My husband is a loyal, energetic type who loves his routines. We still laugh, even doing the mundane, and I love home with him in it. But that pesky fact remains. For people’s comfort, he is the easier one to like.
