Political Satire

Trumpers Now An Endangered Species

Their entire habitat likely to be gone by 2024

Here we see a thriving nest of Trumpers. Their habitat is rapidly declining, however. Photo by Michelle Teheux

In a shocking turnaround, Trumpers have been added to the endangered species list, a group of Conservative Conservationists have announced.

This is despite the fact that not long ago, Trumpers numbered in the millions and their habitat included vast swathes of the U.S.

Unlike other endangered species, such as the Lesser Prairie Chicken, which is limited to the southern and central high plains, Trumpers enjoyed habitats stretching across all parts of the country.

But now, their long-term survival is in doubt.

There are two subspecies of Trumpers.

One, the Money-Backed Anti-Tax Trumper, could be found in some rural areas but was also found in large cities.

Despite the best efforts of Conservative Conservationists, specimens of the Money-Backed Anti-Tax Trumper can now only rarely be found. It is not known what happened to them, but an opportunistic newly discovered species, the DeCovid-Coddler, seems to have moved right into the ecological niche vacated by the Money-Backed Anti-Tax Trumper.