Satire

Make Kids Pay For High School

Hell, let’s charge them for kindergarten, too!

Photo by on

What are we thinking, letting the poors off the hook for part of the cost of the college education they chose to blow money on?

It’s a step in the wrong direction. But we can make it right: We must start charging people for all their education. Yes, high school, middle school, elementary school, kindergarten — all of it.

I cannot think of a better way to help keep uppity poors from thinking they’re going to crash the middle or even upper class than by issuing bills that come due shortly after their high school graduation (or, ideally, the date they drop out). Expect to see more poors dropping out to save money.

This will solve the national debt!

Just think of all those years of compound interest! I think it’s probable that we can not only pay off the national debt but, quite likely, cut taxes for the ultra-wealthy as well. Why should the job creators have to pay for the society for which they already do so much?

Think of all the jobs created when someone buys a Lamborghini or orders a yacht or decides to make their own space rocket.