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CULTURE | FAMILY | MARRIAGE
My Husband and I Don’t Exchange Holiday Gifts
We have never regretted our decision to not buy each other presents
Most couples get into a gift-giving routine. They either compose a list of desired items (easier today with an Amazon Wish List), they drop hints, or they hope for the best. However, the mutual decision at the beginning of a relationship to forego gifts altogether is an unusual one.
Our policy of not exchanging gifts stems from financial issues early in our marriage, a history of disappointing gifts from my ex-husband, and the alleviation of additional holiday stress. My husband and I have been together for 35 years. When I first broached the topic, he was delighted with the suggestion. It was a relief not to have to stress out about buying the “right” gift and not to be a hostage to societal expectations.
At the beginning of our relationship, it was about money. I have always been someone who attempts to live within a budget. We have a blended family. Including the daughter we share, my husband has three other children from two former wives, and I have two other children with my ex. Allocating about $150 per child, Christmas was expensive. We didn’t need to add extra money to the mix by purchasing gifts for ourselves.