Humor

Baba Yaga, the Famous Russian Witch, Dealing with her Toxic Ex-Boyfriend, Vladimir Putin

Dr. Folklore’s Dating Advice for Mythical Folks (Number 68)

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Origin Story: Said to be first mentioned in Slavic Folklore, Baba Yaga is a witch-like deity with a tall nose and long chicken legs who lives in a remote spinning house with legs that only stops if you say the correct spell. Russians accused her of eating children, though all the young protagonists in her stories escape without anyone being eaten.

At the time of this article, Ukraine is in war with Russia. President Putin originally said it was to liberate the country from “Neo-Nazis,” even though countless researchers and Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy himself say there is no evidence to support this claim.

Dear Dr. Folklore,

My toxic, shirtless, bear-riding ex is taking his anger out on my new Ukrainian boo, Volodymryr, after I dumped his ass back in February. He sends millions of trolls out every day to serenade me, which is a big turn-off because they’re supposed to be spreading havoc among the internet.

I sent him a short message reiterating the world doesn’t revolve around him, and he “breaks up” with me — even though I broke up with him — by…