Member-only story
My Hate Mail: The Dark Side of Standing Up for Single People
Why are people so threatened by happy single people?
I am an unapologetic advocate for single people — all of them, but especially those who love being single and want to stay single, the Single at Heart. I’ve always known that my position might generate resistance.
Ever since I published , and then continued to stand up for single people in my other and and , I expected to get inundated with hate mail. Instead, what I get most often are notes of appreciation. People share their stories, often about how they like being single but thought that meant there was something wrong with them, until they came across my writings. I save every one of those emails.
But I do get hate mail, too, though far less often. I’ll share the most recent disparaging email I got, not because there is anything special about it, but because it is representative of others I’ve received over the years. I’m not going to pick on this person or analyze the specifics of what he has to say. Instead, I’ll explain why these kinds of emails do not bother me on a personal level, but leave me feeling very troubled about their broader implications. I’ll also tell you why I…