CHRONIC PAIN & ILLNESS

How Chronic Pain Tries to Erase Me

Pain has made me small, but I’m smiling

I refuse to be a living ghost. (Photo by on )

I’m invisible, like someone in a fog. You might sense that I’m there. I’m like a shadow in your periphery. My words may reach you, but I am still unseen.

I want to be seen.

I disappear from people’s minds the moment I say, “I’m in pain.” That’s when people quickly say, “I’m sorry,” while they flinch and turn away. I understand their fears. I know pain and illness are uncomfortable. Pain is impolite. It overstays its welcome.

It is unwanted company — a negative in a world awash in negativity.

Pain is subjective. You can’t feel what I feel, and I thank the Gods for that. It also means that when I say I’m hurting, people don’t fully believe me because they’d have to show compassion and that’s just too much work for some. Empathy demands effort. Others care, but they can’t empathize.

There are those who don’t see me because they don’t want to. Deny it, but they don’t even…