How to Embrace Uncertainty Through Perspective
We were blind all along
In a few months, I will take the first steps in “the path less traveled by,” as Robert Frost . What awaits me are daunting challenges, no promises of success, and resistance from my environment. Every few days (more like hours), I am overwhelmed with fear and consider switching lanes before it is too late. But a soft, visceral voice keeps reminding me that this is what I must do. Although I know my best self lies beyond that door, my shaking legs tempt me to linger.
We admire those who devoted themselves to purpose and creation. The media is obsessed with them, our friends want to be like them, and our family honors them. “They are something special,” we say as if their success is inscribed in the scroll of fate. We talk of their uniqueness to distinguish us from them, to reinforce our decision for soothing mediocracy. But in doing so—in hiding the years of struggle, self-doubt, and anxiety—we create more fear around an already intimidating foe: uncertainty.
Franz Kafka is one of the most acclaimed 20th-century authors. Yet, he died in obscurity and anguish at the age of 40. In 1907, he entered the workforce with distaste, holding a grudge against his father for that. He would spend the next two decades (up until his death) toiling at an insurance company. His only solace came at night, where for a few hours, he wrote. He burnt 90 percent of his writings out of self-doubt; he requested in his will for his friend to burn the remaining 10 percent, but he instead published them—for our gratitude.
What could his life be like if he had self-belief? How many masterpieces turned to ash and haunt the Museum of Humanity?
Our parents—out of love—pushed us towards safety. Which, in a world centered around money, translated into a steady joy and a white picket fence. Our parent’s turmoil and actions emphasized the importance of conformity. Uncertainty was the paint for poverty and disease; it was the pigment of separation and death. Unfortunately, our deepest aspirations often do not align with our map of the world. Thus we became paralyzed between fear and hope.
Most of us hide from this anguish by numbing our awareness of this plight. We immerse in trend culture, get in debt, binge eat, and overwork. Since we cannot bear the fog of uncertainty, we choose the default, seemingly safe path. But everything interesting, meaningful, and enlivening lies beyond the gulf of doubt.
We make a deal with the devil: comfort for our souls. And so the painter becomes a banker. Which raises the question: how many skeletons in the ground could have written classics, cured cancer, or established peace between religions?
We need a fresh perspective on uncertainty. In an ideal society, it would be courageous and commendable to go against safety. Social media would spotlight failure and its overcoming, films would capture bankruptcy followed by a triumph of the spirit, and we would be encouraged to follow our heart wishes—however bizarre.
Embracing uncertainty is terrifying. We are like foundlings who roam the world outside the orphanage for the first time. But this is what we will one day be nostalgic about and call “life.”
We should not fear death; we should fear not having lived. We should, amid all the chaos, for a moment, and appreciate being awake to life with all of its complexities.
As Kafka wrote:
My ‘fear’ is my substance, and probably the best part of me.
Originally published at on July 10, 2023.
