Sexual Repression and the American Dating Collapse: You Need An Intervention If You Think My Work Is Extreme

Why Most of My Female Clients Aren’t a Fit for U.S. Men On Any Side of the Political Spectrum

Author photo. Red lipstick and a t-shirt isn't dead.

America is in a weird place right now. It feels like a country in the middle of a man’s really humiliating midlife crisis. We’ve overcorrected so hard in both directions — toward purity culture and toward digital hedonism — that most women I know feel like they’re either being cast in the Handmaid’s Tale or as online porn stars.

There’s not a lot of room left in between — actually being in the middle makes you feel a little insane sometimes.

I didn’t have this language when I first started dating in my late 30’s after a long marriage, but I quickly realized something strange: I broadly appealed to most men when it came to “just dating” but less could see me as a partner. Same for me — but it wasn’t about attraction.

It was that something about me that just didn’t feel like them.

And the longer I did somatic coaching, the clearer it became. Most people are walking around with this invisible internal fit filter asking “what will blend into my social world and what feels like home on some level?”