Do You Believe Me Now

A Poem

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You said ‘I love you’
and it sounded like a vague promise to stay
no matter how bad things get.
But how could that have been true
when you didn’t know just how bad things could get?

You found me sobbing and bleeding
on the bathroom floor from wounds
both hidden and clearly visible.
I’m sure you thought ‘This is the worst of it.’
Oh, how wrong you were.

Tell me, did you regret making that promise?
When the light left my eyes
and I became someone you didn’t recognize?
When the girl you loved became
a broken shell
and it was impossible not to get cut
on her edges?
When you got caught
in the crossfire of
the war I waged against myself?
Did you regret becoming a casualty?

They say ‘When people tell you who they are,
believe them.’
But when I told you I was a time bomb,
counting down the seconds until disaster,
you tried to convince me
I was wrong.
Tell me, do…